Friday, June 23, 2006

Good news, bad news, and everything in between

Ugh...

So I was totally ready to do this again! I felt re-energized, I felt healed from all of the losses, we were ready to go. But as usual, my body has failed to cooperate. I went to Dr. Mac's yesterday for my mid-cycle u/s...on cd 15. Not a single follicle over 10mm, and my lining was just under 6mm...this cycle is a bust. I was frustrated, and Terri knew that. She was honest and said she thought it was time to try something else. Patrick agreed, too, so we're back to Clomid next cycle. We haven't done it since I lost the twins over a year ago. I was on 50mgs then, but Terri said they might bump me up to 100mgs just to get an even better response. Whatever...I just want to have a chance again! So we wait for my period...the usual "call on day 1". I'm so sick of waiting.

In other news, tennis and soccer are still going well. I alternate moments of greatness is each sport...our soccer game was rough last night, but my tennis match the night before was a breeze. I'm just happy to be out there playing again!

Now for the most interesting news....we have a new member of our family. Here's the story that I wrote out to a friend....

So in the middle of the monsoon on Sunday night (we had massive flooding over the weekend and Monday), Patrick is driving home. He's getting off the highway onto the access road and sees something dart in front of his truck. I'm on the phone with him, and he says that he'll call me back. He thought it was a possum, but realized it was a very small kitten. He pulled over and looked for him. Found him cowered under a bush...wet, dirty, and covered in fleas. He looked around for a mama cat or other kittens, but he was all alone and there are no houses or anything where he was. He said he was small, I estimated 7-8 weeks, but he thought he was too small. He knew he would die (probably get hit by a car if the weather and fleas didn't kill him or he'd starve) if he left him, so when he called me back, the kitten was in the truck with him.
Now the #1 concern was Feline AIDS and feline leukemia (as a risk to our other 3 cats), not to mention the fleas. So first, genius kitten crawls into the console of Patrick's truck...after 30 minutes of searching for him we finally got him out! We wrap him in a towel and head to the store (this is at 10pm Sunday night by the way) and get shampoo, a flea comb, food, little bowls, etc. He's staying in the guest bathroom so we can keep him apart from the other cats. So we start shampooing him...the fleas are HORRIBLE. He's so irritated and is bleeding from how bad the fleas were and they were all trying to latch on....I started bawling. Patrick considered taking him straight to the SPCA instead of bringing him home, but after seeing all of the fleas, we know they would have just given up and put him down....Patrick worked on the fleas for over an hour...he wouldn't give up. We would take breaks and I would hold him in a towel. Finally, we used some flea spray that we just put on cottonballs. That helped, but they all ran to his head. We did the best we could, and left him in the bathtub with towels to snuggle, food and water (he ate like he was starving) and a litterbox made out of a shoe box (with a little doorway cut out).
Patrick woke up and took him to the vet first thing Monday morning. He weighed 1lb 2oz, and the vet said he was actually about 5 weeks old. He was negative for Feline AIDS/leukemia, but he had hookworms and of course the fleas. He got medicine for the hookworms, and he got the best medicine ever for fleas. It's called Capstar, and it worked so wonderfully!!!! He went to the vet at 7am. By 1pm, he had absolutely NO live fleas on him anymore...they were all dead and laying in his towel bedding. I sat with him for 2 hours Monday in the guest bathroom (studying for school...LOL!), and not a single flea was on him or me or in the bathroom at all!

Anyway, in less than 24 hours, he had gone from a wet, dirty, sick, flea infested, thrown away kitten, to a spunky orange tabby with the loudest purr and the cutest little pounce. He's playing with toys, eating well, using the litterbox like a champ, and is so loving. He's got a couple of scratches (one on a backleg, one in the corner of his eye, and two little raw spots above his mouth, we think he rubbed it raw from the fleas or it's from dehydration), but he's very good with his hygiene and they're looking great. We made him steps to get in and out of the bathtub (he managed to get out but then couldn't get back in...LOL!), so now when you open the door, he hops out and comes to greet you. Just this morning he started doing the rub against your legs thing....he's got such a good spirit...

Anyway, Patrick said he needed a name, so due to the massive flooding...his name is Noah. We had planned to find him a home, but he's just taken over our hearts and we can't imagine giving him away at this point.

Apparently about a month ago, Patrick was all the way over in the left lane on the highway and saw a kitten get hit by a car in one of the right lanes. He said it just made him so mad....so I think he needed to save this kitty. He was so amazing. He kept asking if he had made a mistake, if he was a sucker, or if I was mad because he could have risked our cats' health (which he didn't because we're smart enough to keep them apart which is all you have to do)...I told him that the fact that he did this is one of the reasons I married him...he has such a big heart...and to see him with this 1lb kitty makes me cry....he found him on Father's Day...and though I haven't said anything to him about it...I wonder if that had something to do with how hard he worked to save Noah....

So here's my new baby....



Friday, June 16, 2006

30 isn't so bad....

Well, I actually ended up having a very fun and relaxing beach weekend for my 30th birthday. We were laid back, I had martinis on the fishing pier, we ate good food (and an awesome b-day cake), and we danced...that's right, I said we. Patrick totally let loose and danced on my birthday and that totally made the night!

So now I'm moving on...SO much going on. Just call me Sporty Spice for the summer. I've playing in 2 tennis leagues (and doing pretty well!), and I did it. I'm playing in the Over 30 soccer league. I had what was probably the best game I've ever played last night. I scored!! I'm a defender so that never happens, but we didn't have any subs, so I switched to play forward and after several attempts (including a respectable penalty kick that went straight to the goalie) finally a beautiful shot went in. It made me feel good when patrick said "I saw the ball go in, and I had to look back and make sure it was you that shot it". : ) I'm sore today, but it's totally worth it!

So what now? Remember I said that we'd be out of the running due to timing this month. Well my idiot body decided to surprise me last month and ovulate early...either cycle day 18 or 19...earliest ever for me. I realized when it was happening but "things" did not cooperate and we missed the window...oh well, I drank guilt-free on my birthday. However, ovulating early meant getting my period early (early by my standards....like before cycle day 40!) which means we could actually try this month. So we talked, and decided to go for it. My mid-cycle u/s is Thursday....if there's a good follicle, then we trigger! I'm tired of waiting. I'm not going to stop living life for this anymore, but I'm also not going to sit on the sidelines!

So that's it. I've got tons of schoolwork to do, lots of soccer games and tennis matches to play, I should manage to keep myself pretty busy until the end of this cycle....and we'll just see what happens.

I really feel like I haven't truly had the courage to try since the last miscarriage. We've only seriously tried once since then...just once...and even then, my heart just wasn't in it. But now I'm ready again...I really am. We both are. When we decided to go for it this month, there were no tears...just a mutual "It's time." The decision felt good...and I feel more at peace...